In this stage of relationship development, the goals are a reduction of uncertainty through knowledge acquisition and an exchange of identity declarations (Wood 1982). We see this occurs in the film when Melvin discovers Carol has a sick child and Carolyn discovers Melvin is obsessive-compulsive. When Melvin unwraps the plastic utensils he always takes to the restaurant, Carol tells him "Sometimes you must try other people's clean silverware, as part of the fun of eating out" (Brooks 1997).
As Wood (2003) maintains, "?communication in its many forms is central to personal and social life" (p. 2). However, Melvin's gruff demeanor and insulting form of communication makes it difficult for him to build relationships that provide a fulfilling personal or social life.
Friendship and Development: Putting the Most Human Relationship in Its Place. By: Bukowski, Willilam B.; Sippola, Lorrie K.. New Directions for Child & Adolescent Development, Fall2005, Vol. 2005 Issue 109, p91-98, 8p; Abstract: The article focuses on the connection between friendship and child development. It examines how friendship has been treated by theorists and in past research, and looks forward to see how the study of friendship might be enriched by new ideas, new strategies and new approaches. The authors argue that friendship research would benefit from going back to its conceptual roots by expanding its consideration of what friendship is and how it happens. They proposed that by going back to think broadly about friendship, research on friendship can move forward to reveal its significance for human development.; (AN 18580810) PDF Full Text (500K)
Before the stage of relationship development that brings bonding and intimacy can occur, various challenges and conflicts must be overcome. Intimate friendships can provide a security system but they also provide a means of self-reference from the perspective of another. The needs of both individuals must be met for intimate friendship to develop, a process that often entails revising communication, a "transitional state" during which partners acknowledge their "commitment to an extended future as a pair" (Wood, 1982, p. 80). Bukowski and Sippola (2005) argue that before intimate friendship develops "the challenges, stresses, and struggles that may be inherent to friendship, especially the challenge of negotiating a balance between one's needs and those of the other" must be overcome (p. 95).
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